July Indoor Gathering
July Theme: Reconnecting to Each Other
-> Featuring Heart Leader Lauren Moore of Sacred Living Arts, contributing heart leadership to our gathering message, spiritual practice, and musical inspiration.
Connect with Lauren on her website, Instagram or Facebook.
OPENING MEDITATION
💗Loving-Kindness (aka Metta) Meditation: a heart-centered practice of remembering, connecting to, and extending the love within.
Click here for a 10-minute Loving Kindness meditation, guided by Jen.
GATHERING MESSAGE
Our theme this month, our central message, is about reconnecting to each other. It’s one of three parts of the mission of our community (reconnecting to ourselves, each other, and nature). We began last month by remembering our deepest Selves, and this month we expand beyond ourselves, widening our view and opening our hearts, to begin to see and include one another.
This order was intentional; there is a bridge here that begins in the heart, which reveals to us the inseparable nature of first remembering and loving our true Selves, our deepest Selves, and then from that place of remembrance, we can connect to and extend love to others.
What do we mean by connection, and how do we define connection as a community?
First, it’s important to acknowledge that the need to connect and experience love and belonging is essential for all of us; it’s wired into our neurobiology - and that is why we suffer when we feel an absence of connection.
Brene Brown is a researcher and professor, and the wisdom she has gleaned over 20 years of studying courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy is beautifully laid out in her book “Atlas of the Heart - Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience.”
Here’s how Brene has defined connection in her book:
“After years of research, I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.“ p. 169
One of the most challenging parts of connection is that we first have to be willing to allow ourselves to be seen and heard. We have to allow ourselves to give and receive without judgment, to build connection. When we can do that, when we feel free enough to do that, that is the beginning of authentic connection and the feeling of true belonging.
What does it look like to move from having a connection with another person or group to a feeling of true belonging?
First, belonging is a feeling, akin to fulfillment, that happens within us as we relate to ourselves and each other. It’s often flux in our moment-to-moment experience.
Brene shares that “true belonging is the spiritual practice of believing in and belonging to yourself so deeply that you can share your most authentic self with the world and find sacredness in both being a part of something and standing alone in the wilderness. True belonging doesn’t require you to change who you are; it requires you to be who you are.” p. 156-156
It’s about the need to belong to ourselves AND the need to belong to others.
That’s why when we try to fit into who we think we should be, and it’s not aligned with who we are - we suffer.
And when we try to fit in to who other people want us to be, and it’s not aligned with who we are - we suffer.
Our deepest hope is that we will build authentic connections with each other so we can feel a sense of true belonging in our community.
Belonging is a spiritual practice – first remembering who we are at the deepest level, so we can bring our authentic selves into any room we enter, and second, having the courage to be seen and heard. It is both internal and external. It is active, not passive. It’s not about waiting to belong; it’s about practicing belonging with ourselves and each other. And yet, it can be uncomfortable and difficult, and it will require willingness and trust from each of us.
So, why bother? What makes it worth it?
Well, we all know we need each other and that there is a collective need for fellowship and connection. Recent studies of loneliness in America show that between 20-30% of Americans experience loneliness consistently, sharing that they don’t feel like they have meaningful or close relationships or a sense of belonging.
So, there is a gap here. We know we want connection and belonging, we know we need it, but so many of us are not feeling it. When we look at what Brene shares about true belonging, we can see that this gap exists because we either don’t know ourselves, our true Selves, or we are hiding our true Selves. Most often, we are extending the Self that we think we need to be to fit in, and so we don’t feel belonging to ourselves or with whatever person or group we engage with. According to Brene, if we don’t extend our true selves to be seen and heard, then we cannot feel true belonging.
Belonging is a spiritual practice; it’s not passive – it’s intentional.
It’s about remembering that we are already connected to our deepest Self and to each other. It’s about remembering our shared humanity.
Like it or not, we are bound together. We are all individual branches gathering nourishment from the same tree. The same physical tree called Mother Earth, and the same spiritual tree – called Love. The problem is, we keep forgetting that we are all connected to and through the same physical and spiritual tree.
Our connection is not lost, it's only been forgotten.
Our connection is not something to strive for, but rather to open to.
So, instead of asking how we can get our connection back, let’s ask how we can remember our connection.
What is it that connects us all at the deepest level, at the level of our Spirit/Soul/Essence?
All the world’s traditions point to love as the golden thread that connects us. The practice of loving each other is at the heart of the message of all traditions. We are all capable of giving and receiving love. Love is our natural state and our birthright - but we are blocking it – we are blocking ourselves from knowing the love that is within, and then seeing the love in each other.
We all see the concept of love through our own lenses, so in this gathering, we explored some perennial wisdom about love through a few of the world’s traditions, remembering to take what resonates with us and leave the rest.
QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION
What does it mean to me to belong to myself?
Who is my true Self?
In what ways am I listening to and honoring my true Self? In what ways do I want to listen and honor my true Self more deeply?
In what ways am I allowing my true Self to be seen and heard? In what ways do I want to be seen and heard more fully?
SPIRITUAL INVITATION FOR JULY
Choose one way you intend to practice listening to and honoring your true Self, and put it into action in your life this month.
Choose one way you will allow yourself to be seen and heard, and put it into action in your life this month.
PERENNIAL WISDOM SOURCES
DIVINE FEMININE
“The Prophetess” by Chelan Harkin
Reading selection: “Love” (pp.31-33)
Order from a local Rock County bookstore here.
SUFISM
13th Century Sufi mystic and poet, Rumi - Reading selection: “The Alchemy of Love.”
Order a collection of Rumi poems from a local Rock County bookstore here.
BUDDHISM
"No Mud, No Lotus” by Thich Nhat Hanh, a Zen Buddhist Teacher.
Reading selection, “Developing Understanding and Compassion” p.38
Order from a local Rock County bookstore here.
INDIGENOUS
“Spirit Wheel” by Steven Charleston - an Indigenous Elder of the Choctaw Nation
Reading Selection – “How Well We Love” p. 156
Order from a local Rock County bookstore here.
SPIRITUAL PRACTICE
Special thanks to our Featured Heart Leader, Lauren Moore of Sacred Living Arts, for her contribution to the gathering message and for leading the Spirit of the Heart practice to ground us in connection. Lauren guided us through a somatic heart-opening practice and invited us to see each other as the love we are. We are so grateful for her gifts in leading sacred circle, holding space, and inviting our hearts to open in the spirit of connection.
Connect with Lauren on her website, Instagram or Facebook.
MUSICAL INSPIRATION:
NEXT GATHERING:
Sunday, July 20th, 10am-Noon: RSVP here
Location: Rock River Heritage County Park
What to know/how to prepare:
We’ll begin in circle, setting an intention for our experience, we will explore the park, and have the option to participate or observe the Dances of Universal Peace, led by Robin Schnitzler and Michael Hopwood.
Bring water and comfortable shoes, and be sure to wear protective clothing and/or apply sunscreen and bug spray.
